Sharing my journey

This is not easy for me to do because taking off my mask means getting naked, it means to bear my soul out to you.  It also means Im letting you into my light but also my darkness.  You see I know we all wear masks, we all in our solitude, if we do allow ourselves to be alone with our self, our ego, we discover our hidden truths.  Its difficult to confront those things that as humans we all face.  I for a long time was not happy, and when I say happy it does not mean that I didn't love my life or didn't think I was blessed, I just didn't feel fulfilled if that makes sense.  I constantly was preoccupied in my mind with finding my true purpose or my true 'calling'.  And the feeling that comes with not feeling accomplished or successful is not pretty.  You get sad, you feel like a loser, and you think you will never find your true passion.  You question yourself, you say Im I good enough? and then comes comparison, oh look at this person they are so ...

Change is sometimes hard to accept, hard to come to terms with right?.  Sometimes we lose a relative, a child, or we are hit with an illness, we lose our home, we are let go from a job, these things can happen unexpectedly to anyone.  I remember when I was told my mom had breast cancer, I also remember where I was and exactly how I felt when I was on the phone with the counselor from the hospital.  My heart just dropped, I couldn't process the w ords that she was telling me.  It was like an out of body experience, I was there but my spirit just couldn't bear the news.  It was my mom who called me to tell me the news, but she couldn't finish telling me and handed her phone to the hospital counselor.  The counselor then proceeds to tell me your mom has stage 3 breast cancer, it is very aggressive, that word aggressive paralyzed me right there and I couldn't hear anymore.  After the phone call I proceeded to go back to my desk at work, and I remember my c...